Let's Discuss: The Circumcision Decision

The past few months have been an interesting journey for me.  I've really thought long and hard about circumcision, and done a lot of research.  To be honest, I'm pretty surprised by the decision MacGyver and I have made about circumcision.  I hesitated to blog about our decision, because I know that not all of our family will understand our reasoning.  I really don't care if they 'approve' or not, I just thought maybe avoiding a blog post about the subject would be wise.  Obviously I'm blogging about it anyway.

Had the Sunbean been a boy, I'm sure we'd have had her circumcised.  I just don't think I would have thought twice about it.  I can't speak for everyone, but I know I'm looking at things more closely with my second child.  Things aren't as new and overwhelming this time, so I'm able to think more clearly about the experience I want for my child and I.  Is that a function of the second child, or it is just me?

So MacGyver and I have decided not to circumcise Little Dude.  Our decision to leave him intact was a difficult one, but I feel like we're making the right decision for our family.  In case you're interested, here's our thought process.

The first thing I did was talk to Maya, an awesome mom of two little boys.  I had no idea what decision she'd made about circumcision, but I certainly value her opinion and I know that she makes well-thought-out and researched choices.  After talking to her, I did more research.

I was surprised to learn that the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) doesn't recommend routine circumcision.  They don't necessarily recommend against it, they just recommend not making it a run-of-the-mill, routine procedure.  I think this was the first wake-up call for us.

After that, I put in a call to our pediatrician.  We switched to this pedi when the Sunbean was about a year old, and we love her and trust her.  Again, I was pretty surprised by her comments.  She told me that circumcision is a cosmetic procedure, and she doesn't feel that the medical benefits outweigh the consequences.  She said that she'd be happy to perform a circumcision on Little Dude in the hospital (and she'd give him pain meds...not all places do, FYI), but if she were choosing for her own children, she would leave them intact.

I think the combination of my hippie tendencies (as MacGyver calls it), the recommendation of the AAP, and the recommendation of our pediatrician kind of sealed the deal for us.

There are so many points of debates about circumcision.  I can't believe how fired up people get, on both sides of the table.  One of the top arguments is the 'locker room' factor.  Proponents of circumcision will say that intact boys will be teased around their peers.  I think this one is a tough one to argue, because our  generation was routinely circumcised.  So yes, an intact male that is my age may have been teased (not sure...I was always in the other locker room).  But according to the CDC, the circumcision rate in the US is currently at 32.5% (this does not include circumcisions performed outside of a hospital, like at a bris).  That statistic tells me that Little Dude will not be the only intact male running around.  Of course, we live in the conservative Midwest, and I'd imagine the rate around here is a little higher than it would be, say, on the west coast.  I did ask our pediatrician how many she performs, and she estimated that about 50% of boys in our area are circumcised.

Another point of debate is the idea that intact males are more likely to catch an STD.  This one in particular makes me laugh.  The studies for this debates were done in an area of Africa with a high rate of HIV transmission, so not even our reality (thank goodness).  In my opinion, the best way to prevent my little boy from transmitting an STD is to teach him to wait until he's married to have sex.  I just don't think the STD argument is a valid one.

The other 'big one' is the UTI argument.  Many will say that intact little boys will get lots of UTIs.  I've done the research (and again, talked to our pediatrician), and I just don't think the risk of Little Dude getting a UTI is a valid reason to have him circumcised.  The current statistics (again, from the CDC) states that nearly 500 circumcisions would need to be performed to prevent 1 UTI.  For us, that's just not worth it.

So those are the big arguments, but there are tons of other points of debate, too.  This was a difficult choice for us to make, and I think there are valid ideas on both sides.  We're feeling at peace about the decision we've made, though we're prepared to hear some criticism from our friends and family.  This is the right choice for us, but I don't think it would be the right choice for everyone.

Tell me:  what are your thoughts?  Do you think we're total crazy hippies, or do you agree with our choice?  Do you have a religious perspective?  I'd love to hear what you think!

Advice Needed: Double Strollers

With Little Dude on the way, I've been obsessive with researching double strollers.  The only conclusion I have made is that I'm more confused than when I started all of this nonsense.  So I've got just one logical conclusion left:  let the bloggers decide.

Here's why and when I'll use a double stroller:

• We are out and about nearly every single day.  We just use our strollers a lot.
• The Sunbean loves riding in a stroller, and I prefer that over the snail-pace that I must assume to accommodate her tiny little legs.
• I'll probably wear Little Dude quite a bit, but I'll not be waking a sleeping baby from a carseat just to put him in a wrap.
• So, I'll need a double stroller that can accommodate a carseat and and 3-year-old.
• We use the stroller at the mall, the zoo, garage sales, on walks, at stores, and festivals/events during the summer.
• I'll be flying solo quite often, since MacGyver has one of those 9-5 job-things, so two umbrella strollers aren't really a great choice for us.
• We have a Maclaren single stroller than we love and will definitely hang on to, for when Little Dude is older and Sunbean isn't into the stroller scene anymore, or when I know I'll be wearing Little Dude.

Here are my top three choices and why I like and don't like them.

Joovy Caboose

 This is your basic sit-and-stand stroller.  The reviews are way better on Joovy's version, which is why it is on my list.  It holds a carseat, but the only seat for Sunbean would be by my knees.  I can't see her loving that, since she still dearly loves her stroller.  I don't think she'd be happy in this type of thing at the zoo or something.  I kind of think a stroller with two actual seats would work better for us.  Anyone have experience with a sit-and-stand?

Contours Options

 

This stroller has some pretty sweet seating options.  The seats can be like this, both forward, or both backward.  I know the Sunbean would get a kick out of seeing Little Dude, and it holds a carseat.  The downside for me is that I think it would be like pushing a bus.  The reviews are decent, but all say it is bulky and heavy, and kind of hard to fold.  I think it would be great once it is all set up, but maybe not awesome for getting in and out, with two kids, in a Midwest winter.

Peg Perego Aria 60/40

 How's that for a complicated name for a freaking stroller?  This is probably my front-runner right now.  It does hold a carseat, though it only claims to be compatible with Peg Perego's carseat.  I'm sure just about any carseat would sit on there, though.  The reviews are so-so, but it weighs less than 20 pounds, which is a big feature for me.  The reviews say that it is easy to fold, and easy to heft in and out of a vehicle.  My only worry is that it would be too tough in a store or in the mall.  It claims to fit through a standard doorway, but I obviously don't really have a way to test that.  Peg Perego does have an outlet here, so I plan to go test it out sometime (after we get this supposed 20" of snow this week).

So....what do you think?  Am I crazy for wanting to contain (and push around) my three-year-old?  We're just a few months away from Little Dude's debut, and she's not showing any signs of being the crazy kid running around everywhere (thank goodness!).

Please, oh please, make my decision for me.  I'll take other suggestions, too.  I'd like to keep this under $300 tops, preferably much less.  I'm planning to use this puppy for the next 6-7 years, so I'm okay with spending a little more to get a quality product.

Do tell.

2011 Resolutions

I know lots of people don't like new year's resolutions, goals, or theme words.  I happen to love them.  I'm a serious Type A, and so that type of organization and documentation is just my thang.

This year, though, I've been struggling with developing some good goals.  Mostly because this is a year of exciting changes for our family.  And exciting change = lots of unknowns.  We're for sure going to be having a baby and MacGyver will have a new job.  He'll be graduating this summer, and staying at his current job won't really be a viable option.  And those are just the for-sures.  Life is super great about throwing random events in, too.

With those two huge changes, there are lots of variables.  So many things are 'up in the air' for us right now, I can hardly stand it.  It's making planning really tough.

So I can't make a goal to have a fantastic organic garden, or to organize my house (done), or even make a serious business-related goal.  I feel like anything that is at all dependent on location needs to be put on the back burner this year.  That's seriously hard!

But then, I realized that one thing is constant in my life.  It's these people:

No matter what, I will be a wife and a mother.  No matter where we are living, or what type of income we are living on, I'm going to have my family.  We are together for a very long time.

So my goal this year is just to be the best wife and mama possible.  Let me tell you, I have room for drastic improvement.  Life will probably get in the way sometimes, and I'm sure I'll lose sight of my goal from time to time.  But I'm going to try to just be present for my family a little more, get down on the floor with my kids a little more often, and invest a little more time into my marriage.

What are your plans for 2011?

Let's Discuss: Gift Giving

With the Christmas season upon us, I've been thinking about gift-giving.  I loooooove giving gifts.  More than that, I love giving handmade gifts.  I just love the feeling of thinking about someone as I create something that I think they'll like or use.  I love watching someone's face as they open the gift.  Such fun.  Certainly not an event reserved just for this season, but there is such an abundance of it now.  Love it.

One thing I do not love is the game that is gift-giving.  I seriously hate receiving a gift and not having one to give in return.  I don't mind it the other way around, but receiving without giving is the worst.  If all goes according to plan, this will be our last Christmas as poor college students.  That being said, this is our 'poorest' year as college students.  Our gift-giving this year is strictly limited, but let me tell you.....I'll be making up for it next year.

But what I really want to discuss is how you do Christmas gifts for your kids.  Are you buying one big gift, with smaller gifts?  A bunch of little stuff?  A few things?  Do you have a strict budget, or do you just buy until you think it is done?  Do you spend the same on all of your kids, or do some gifts just cost more?

Last year, I knew the Sunbean would love her Bitty Baby.  And I was so right.  But this year, I can't think of a 'main' gift for her, so we're just getting a bunch of random stuff.

What do you do about Santa?  At our house, Santa brings things like socks and toothbrushes, maybe some candy.  He's a practical man.  He'll bring maybe one or two fun toys, but nothing huge.  As a parent, I want the credit for the cool stuff, dang it.  Some families have Santa as the main gift-giver.  What's your plan?

Do tell.

Let's Discuss: Prenatal Testing

So, when I'm pregnant, I like to read birth boards.  I love to hear what other expecting moms are up to and what they are experiencing.  The big 'buzz' right now is the 12-week NT scan, which can detect Down's Syndrome, among other problems, I believe.

This is the first I've heard of this scan, so I'm guessing it wasn't around or wasn't popular when I was preggo with the Sunbean.  That was forever ago.  You know, 3 years.  Anyway, they do an ultrasound and measure the neck folds to see if the baby is at higher risk.  From there, they'll do bloodwork or more invasive tests, like an amniocentesis.

My OB hasn't mentioned it, so I'm guessing it isn't offered at my office.  Or maybe we'll be doing it at my 12-week visit and I'm clueless.  I guess it has to be done before the 14th week begins.  Either way is fine with me.

On the birth board tonight, a woman had an NT scan today that showed an increased risk of Down's Syndrome.  Pending the results of her bloodwork and amnio, she's planning to abort.  I was floored.

Here's my opinion.  I am all about getting as much prenatal screening and testing as possible.  Whatever is logical, I will do.  I live to be prepared, and so I'd want to read every book ever written on Down's Syndrome if my child were at a high risk of having Down's Syndrome.  I'd have specialists and therapists researched and a plan and a strategy and dang it, I'd be as mentally prepared as possible.

But.  I would not, not, not choose to end my child's life based on a test result.  It makes my stomach turn to think of it.  While I think having a child with special needs (of any sort) would be an intense trial, I would never choose an abortion.  It just isn't me.  Based on my religious beliefs, I know that children with special needs on Earth will go on to inherit our Father's kingdom.  We believe that these 'special needs' are actually blessings that protect these children from the craziness of this world.  Being a parent to these children is certainly a challenge, but even more certainly, a blessing.  I look at it this way:  if Heavenly Father chose for me to become pregnant with this child, then He will provide a way for me to deal.  He has a plan.  I don't always know the details.

So, I love the prenatal screenings for the plan-ahead, be-prepared aspects, but abortion would never be an option for me.

What do you guys think?  Are you a fan of the screenings?  Why or why not?  I know my religious beliefs are a big factor in my opinion.  How about you?

Let's discuss.