The past few months have been an interesting journey for me. I've really thought long and hard about circumcision, and done a lot of research. To be honest, I'm pretty surprised by the decision MacGyver and I have made about circumcision. I hesitated to blog about our decision, because I know that not all of our family will understand our reasoning. I really don't care if they 'approve' or not, I just thought maybe avoiding a blog post about the subject would be wise. Obviously I'm blogging about it anyway.
Had the Sunbean been a boy, I'm sure we'd have had her circumcised. I just don't think I would have thought twice about it. I can't speak for everyone, but I know I'm looking at things more closely with my second child. Things aren't as new and overwhelming this time, so I'm able to think more clearly about the experience I want for my child and I. Is that a function of the second child, or it is just me?
So MacGyver and I have decided not to circumcise Little Dude. Our decision to leave him intact was a difficult one, but I feel like we're making the right decision for our family. In case you're interested, here's our thought process.
The first thing I did was talk to Maya, an awesome mom of two little boys. I had no idea what decision she'd made about circumcision, but I certainly value her opinion and I know that she makes well-thought-out and researched choices. After talking to her, I did more research.
I was surprised to learn that the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) doesn't recommend routine circumcision. They don't necessarily recommend against it, they just recommend not making it a run-of-the-mill, routine procedure. I think this was the first wake-up call for us.
After that, I put in a call to our pediatrician. We switched to this pedi when the Sunbean was about a year old, and we love her and trust her. Again, I was pretty surprised by her comments. She told me that circumcision is a cosmetic procedure, and she doesn't feel that the medical benefits outweigh the consequences. She said that she'd be happy to perform a circumcision on Little Dude in the hospital (and she'd give him pain meds...not all places do, FYI), but if she were choosing for her own children, she would leave them intact.
I think the combination of my hippie tendencies (as MacGyver calls it), the recommendation of the AAP, and the recommendation of our pediatrician kind of sealed the deal for us.
There are so many points of debates about circumcision. I can't believe how fired up people get, on both sides of the table. One of the top arguments is the 'locker room' factor. Proponents of circumcision will say that intact boys will be teased around their peers. I think this one is a tough one to argue, because our generation was routinely circumcised. So yes, an intact male that is my age may have been teased (not sure...I was always in the other locker room). But according to the CDC, the circumcision rate in the US is currently at 32.5% (this does not include circumcisions performed outside of a hospital, like at a bris). That statistic tells me that Little Dude will not be the only intact male running around. Of course, we live in the conservative Midwest, and I'd imagine the rate around here is a little higher than it would be, say, on the west coast. I did ask our pediatrician how many she performs, and she estimated that about 50% of boys in our area are circumcised.
Another point of debate is the idea that intact males are more likely to catch an STD. This one in particular makes me laugh. The studies for this debates were done in an area of Africa with a high rate of HIV transmission, so not even our reality (thank goodness). In my opinion, the best way to prevent my little boy from transmitting an STD is to teach him to wait until he's married to have sex. I just don't think the STD argument is a valid one.
The other 'big one' is the UTI argument. Many will say that intact little boys will get lots of UTIs. I've done the research (and again, talked to our pediatrician), and I just don't think the risk of Little Dude getting a UTI is a valid reason to have him circumcised. The current statistics (again, from the CDC) states that nearly 500 circumcisions would need to be performed to prevent 1 UTI. For us, that's just not worth it.
So those are the big arguments, but there are tons of other points of debate, too. This was a difficult choice for us to make, and I think there are valid ideas on both sides. We're feeling at peace about the decision we've made, though we're prepared to hear some criticism from our friends and family. This is the right choice for us, but I don't think it would be the right choice for everyone.
Tell me: what are your thoughts? Do you think we're total crazy hippies, or do you agree with our choice? Do you have a religious perspective? I'd love to hear what you think!
I was surprised to learn that the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) doesn't recommend routine circumcision. They don't necessarily recommend against it, they just recommend not making it a run-of-the-mill, routine procedure. I think this was the first wake-up call for us.
After that, I put in a call to our pediatrician. We switched to this pedi when the Sunbean was about a year old, and we love her and trust her. Again, I was pretty surprised by her comments. She told me that circumcision is a cosmetic procedure, and she doesn't feel that the medical benefits outweigh the consequences. She said that she'd be happy to perform a circumcision on Little Dude in the hospital (and she'd give him pain meds...not all places do, FYI), but if she were choosing for her own children, she would leave them intact.
I think the combination of my hippie tendencies (as MacGyver calls it), the recommendation of the AAP, and the recommendation of our pediatrician kind of sealed the deal for us.
There are so many points of debates about circumcision. I can't believe how fired up people get, on both sides of the table. One of the top arguments is the 'locker room' factor. Proponents of circumcision will say that intact boys will be teased around their peers. I think this one is a tough one to argue, because our generation was routinely circumcised. So yes, an intact male that is my age may have been teased (not sure...I was always in the other locker room). But according to the CDC, the circumcision rate in the US is currently at 32.5% (this does not include circumcisions performed outside of a hospital, like at a bris). That statistic tells me that Little Dude will not be the only intact male running around. Of course, we live in the conservative Midwest, and I'd imagine the rate around here is a little higher than it would be, say, on the west coast. I did ask our pediatrician how many she performs, and she estimated that about 50% of boys in our area are circumcised.
Another point of debate is the idea that intact males are more likely to catch an STD. This one in particular makes me laugh. The studies for this debates were done in an area of Africa with a high rate of HIV transmission, so not even our reality (thank goodness). In my opinion, the best way to prevent my little boy from transmitting an STD is to teach him to wait until he's married to have sex. I just don't think the STD argument is a valid one.
The other 'big one' is the UTI argument. Many will say that intact little boys will get lots of UTIs. I've done the research (and again, talked to our pediatrician), and I just don't think the risk of Little Dude getting a UTI is a valid reason to have him circumcised. The current statistics (again, from the CDC) states that nearly 500 circumcisions would need to be performed to prevent 1 UTI. For us, that's just not worth it.
So those are the big arguments, but there are tons of other points of debate, too. This was a difficult choice for us to make, and I think there are valid ideas on both sides. We're feeling at peace about the decision we've made, though we're prepared to hear some criticism from our friends and family. This is the right choice for us, but I don't think it would be the right choice for everyone.
Tell me: what are your thoughts? Do you think we're total crazy hippies, or do you agree with our choice? Do you have a religious perspective? I'd love to hear what you think!
9 comments:
Thank you for posting this. I agree with you. My favorite source of information on the subject is from drmomma.org To help with diaper changes: "Don't retract, only clean what is seen."
For anyone else, your children can always modify their bodies as adults, they can never grow something back after it is removed.
Tyler had pretty strong opinions about this, so I deferred to him. Will is circumcised.
Religiously, I am going with the circumcision for our boys. I have actually been thinking about doing it the Jewish way- during a "bris". I really don't care about the other arguments for a circumcision, mine is purely a religious one.
Although, Reed had several mission companions (all from Europe) who were not circumcised. So, either way, I think it would be fine!
Valerie, The Bible states quite clearly that circumcision is not a Christian requirement. It means "nothing" in the eyes of God. Before making such a decision for your son you owe it to him to at least know what your Bible says about the practice.
As another mentioned, if religion is the reason, why not start with these verses?
Acts 15:1-35
Galatians 5:6
1 Corinthians 7:19
Galatians 6:15
3 Nephi 15:4-5
Moroni 8:8
D&C 74
We had our son circumcised, and my husband watched the whole procedure. He said that he was 110% sure that the baby felt nothing. There was topical cream to numb the area for the needle (for more meds). It healed really quickly and it never seemed to bother him during diaper changes.
We did it for two reasons:
First, I know of two friends who had to be circumcised at ages 9 and 12 due to serious infections of the foreskin. I was worried about the cleanliness factor. It's something that has to be taught properly and I wasn't really sure that a young boy was going to do a good job. Both friends who had it done later in life said it was traumatic and much more painful. They remembered it and it was generally a bad experience.
Second, my husband is circumcised and he was happy with the decision his mother made for him, and felt like our son should have the same.
Overall, it's a pretty trendy procedure... it comes in and out of "style" and so do the recommendations and suggestions. For me, none of the other stuff mattered. These two reason were good enough for me. As with anything, there are happy people on both sides of the fence.
This is what Jake and I discussed; First of all when it comes to OUR religion and circumcision, D&C 74 gives and explanation of this issue. Parts of the New Testament state that circumcision is no longer needed because it was part of the Law of Moses which has been fulfilled. D&C74 therefore provides more clarity on the issue. Circumcision is not needed for the salvation of little children because they are naturally clean and holy, being sanctified thru the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Circumcision has become frequently practiced in modern culture because of assumed benefits to health and cleanliness. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints leaves the decision up to the discretion of the parents and does not make a recommendation for or against the practice...that’s what we found online. That being said, which no one can argue with, here is our thought process when we decided to get Joey circumcised. For us, it was it was pretty simple, if we decided to NOT circumcise Joey the consequence of that decision would have been Joey's for the rest of his life. After every gym class, every locker room shower, every physical, and I'm sure he will be nervous enough on his wedding night so why add more to it (That is a direct quote from Jake ;) and of course we thought about the issues of cleanliness, odor and infections. On the other hand, if we decided to circumcise Joey, the consequence of that decision would be ours as parents to change his diaper carefully for 2 weeks and putting on A&D ointment. Obviously at the time they took Joey for the circumcision, it was hard knowing what they were going to do to him, (but like you said they do give him cream to numb it). Jake said, as a guy "I'm glad my parents chose to put me thru a few moments of discomfort, rather than to force me to go thru life being self conscious and full of embarrassment." Again, the church has no preference for or against circumcision, to us that means there is no right or wrong decision for everyone. We just wanted to share our thought process...I hope we are still friends ha ha ha! ;)
I don't think it's my decision to make. We circumcised our first son, and that removed his choice. We left our second son intact. Should he want a circumcision later on, we'll take him to do it and pay for it. There are risks to any surgical procedure and we definitely weren't told about them when M was circumcised. And as you said, numbing creams are not standard at every hospital. M was taken to be circumcised without either of us knowing, so my husband wasn't able to be present. I hope they numbed him beforehand.
I think for us the most difficult part will be explaining to the boys why they look different from each other.
I love that you did homework and made the decission you feel is best for you and your little dude. we had Kenny done before going home. I was worried about the cleaniness factor like on of the other posts. I did not want to be the mom outside the bathroom asking if he cleaned right! I can tell you that working in the medical profession I see lots of 20ish men and older come in to get it done because of infections. As another post said they did one but not the other because they felt they took the choice away...I so respect that and think had I thought about that when I was pregnant with Kenny I might not have done it but even now I think I would still do it...I can tell you any boy I have in the future will still be done. Call me crazy or a hypocrit but I still go back to standing outside the bathroom door asking if he cleaned right!! Again I'm glad you made the choice you wanted and not let others influence you!!
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